Johnny groaned before standing. One day he surprises his teacher with an announcement. Little Johnny asked his Grandma, Granny, what happened to the toilet brush I gave you?Darling, I really didnt like it. See ya!, As someone who is antisocial and introverted, this greatly appeals to me. Suggested read: Top 40 What's the Difference Between Jokes. Johnny said, well, he likes to cut people in half. Teacher: Are you even paying attention, Johnny? Thats right everyone said the teacher. But she still doesn't know. Please, please send clothes for all those poor ladies on Dads computer. "Come on mom, the most important thing is that Im healthy! Take a look, 62 of The darkest Jokes Ever Told Online | Dark Humor Jokes. Principal: "What is 3 x 3. Little johnny says i wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best girl with me, give her a ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in hawaii, a mansion in paris, a jet to travel through europe, an infinite visa card and to make love to her 3 times a day. English teacher asks the class: Which tense is the sentence I AM BEAUTIFUL?Little Johnny replies, Clearly, past tense., Teacher: "How much is half of 8? "Johnny replies "I lent it to my friend, he wanted to scare his parents. The teacher decided to ask the class a riddle. And its no reason for you to talk like that. Teacher: "What is an island? "Johnny: "Well where did you find our mummy? All we know is Ellis' pre-game routine lands him in our third spot in our top 10 strangest all-time pre-game routines by NBA players. Suddenly, an old lady approached Johnny and said Young man, dont you know its bad for you to eat so many candy, it will rot your teeth and make you sick. 1) A husband and wife are having issues in the bedroom. "Teacher: "So your dad ran away? For three days she asked us how much is two and two. Top 50 Jokes about Little Johnny Johnny was in the playground with his friend Jimmy, when he noticed the brand new shiny watch Jimmy was wearing. So she held up a sign with a picture of a cat and asked Whats this animal name? ", Little Johnny asked his grandpa to croak like a frog. "That is great", says Little Johnny, "cause he'd be stuffed if he needed glasses!". I plan on posting videos of my little johnny jokes, my family jokes and fishing videos. ", Teacher: "Johnny, I want you to say a sentence that begins with the letter i", Little Johnny gets back from school and his dad says to him "Johnny, where is your report card? ", Little Johnny's family is sitting at the dinner table.Father, "Can you please pray for dinner! Everyone replied with a dog teacher! One of our many staff writers who preferred to keep his privacy. One day Jimmy got home early from school.His elder sister asked, Why are you home so early?He answered, Because I was the only one that answered a question in my class.She said, Wow, my brother is a genius.What was the question?Jimmy replied, The question was Who threw the trash can at the principals head?, A third grade teacher always took role call each morning and had the pupils' answer by reciting a short poem.The first kid sat in the first row was a teachers pet. Santas gonna have a Merry Christmas too. Ones blue, but the other is green.Little Johnny: Im not sure. I hope Susie doesnt start thinking shes missing parts! In seconds my dad was a hundred yards away at the bottom of the hill. A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the . That made me chuckle out loud Dang A month? "I covered it with peanut butter and he woofed it down. His dad says to the teacher "Hang on a minute, I had Johnny at home with me for 2 months and I never phoned you once when he misbehaved. I have two half-siblings.. If you shoot one, the other two will fly away", Teacher: "Can you tell me something important that didn't exist 100 years ago? His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, No honey for you for one month! Later that afternoon, Johnnys dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. ", Teacher: What do you want to be when you grow up?, Five-year-old Little Johnny was lost, so he went up to a policeman and said, Ive lost my dad!, Teacher: "If you add 3452 and 3096, then divide the answer by 4 and multiply by 6, what would you get?". ", Teacher: "What is further away, Australia or the Moon? A Bit Longer: Good Jokes Jokes to Tell Your Friends Spoken Jokes. Not really sure what was going on, she showed Little Johnny. Head over to this list of conversation starters! 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Welcome to my page the official page of jeremy littel. ", Teacher: "Fred can you find me America on the map please? Do you really expect me to believe that? Dirty Little Johnny jokes Tweet dirty little-johnny memes Requestedin Adult & Dirtyby If Then editedby MC Jester 4 Jokes 3like0dislike Little Suzie got her first period. , Johnny was pleased to the roof, the next day when he was on his way to school to tell his friends he ran into the local mail man and told him I know the whole truth! "My grandpa lived to be 100!" Special Occasions: Christmas Jokes Thanksgiving Jokes Birthday Jokes. Hes a thief., Johnny got caught digging a hole in his yard. ", Little Johnny to his mom: I shot 4 goals at the soccer match today!Mom: Wonderful, looks like your team won, right?Little Johnny: Not really, we played 2:2., But he still managed to score 4 times, which is more than all the others combined. "Wow, but did he eat twenty candy bars in a single sitting?" "His mother replies "To make myself beautiful Johnny. Johnny was curious and wanted to try it for himself, so when he got home the same say and saw his mother he approached her and said Mom, I know the whole truth! She also works with Search Engine Optimization, so you could find Bored Panda's articles easier.Just's not only an avid equestrian, but she's also a walking encyclopedia. For now, though, scroll on down below and check out our selection of the best jokes about Little Johnny that we've found! The teacher asked Johnny to give her an example of a sentence using the word geometry. What is it? she asked. Larysa is a list curator at Bored Panda. Whats awesome about Little Johnny jokes is that even if they seem naive and innocent at first, they can be a little or downright dirty too! Here are some dirty Little Johnny jokes that are definitely rated-R and may be too hot to handle! ", I asked little Johnny, "What would you like for your birthday?". Little Johnny said, Easy. Johnny always takes the nickel and the older boys laugh at him. "Mum: "No it doesn't my son. Santa responds back, "Okay. The first guy comes back with 10 oranges. ": 40 Hilarious Before-And-After Pictures, As Shared By These Women With A Sense Of Humor (New Pics), 30 Of The Most Spine-Chilling Things Kids Have Ever Said, As Shared In This Viral Twitter Thread, "An Entitled Mother Insists That I 'Share' My Nintendo Switch With Her Child On My Flight", Someone Asks "What Makes You Not Want To Have Kids?" 5. There latest trick is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime. So that's why teachers can be b*tchy some daysthey have 7 holes up theirs. "Johnny: "In Vishakhapatnam. We will not publish or share your email address in any way. Little Johnny jokes often make use of puns and riddles which can also lead to misunderstandings that can be awkward and hilarious at times! ", Little Johnny returns from the supermarket with his mother. "Santa wrote back: "Send me your mother ". ", Teacher: "What came after the Stone Age and the Bronze Age? When he was done, he asked the kids, "Where do you want to go?" -. The teacher decided to ask the class a riddle. ", Little Johnny: "I'm not going back to school ever again! ", Little Johnny gets back from school and his dad says to him "Johnny, where is your report card? ", Teacher: "Would you at the back of the room stop passing notes! During English class, the teacher asks Little Johnny "Have you ever heard of the word contagious before? Annoyed, Little Johnny asked his mom where they had got her from. We respect your privacy. While his mum is putting away the groceries she sees that little johnny has taken a box of animal biscuits and spread them all over the kitchen table. This happened with my great uncle and young cousin for years. Of course not, Johnny! "Curious, the teacher asked, "And where did you learn that, Johnny? The teacher asked what his favorite magic trick is. So Little Johnny hauled ass for the door. ", While grading essays, the teacher noticed that Little Johnnys paper about Family Pets was the same as his brothers. 1. Despite the names being different, all of these funny jokes are basically the same - a kid answering a question in a hilariously straightforward and almost ingenious manner. "Teacher: "How come? Favorite meal: the sphinx with the sour cream. The teacher asks, What are you going to be when you get out of school?Little Johnny thinks for a moment and says, An old man!, Little Johnny's preschool class went on a field trip to the fire station. ", Teacher: "What is further away, Australia or the Moon?". Is he able to see alright?". So Little Johnny hauled ass for the door. The World's Best Dirty Jokes - Mr. J 1996-05 Whether it's the one about the elephant and the canary or the one about the travelling salesman and the farmer's daughter, Mr J has gathered together the very best - the very funniest - from a large crop of dirty jokes. Or the Moon? `` mom, the teacher asked Johnny to give an... He likes to cut people in half done, he asked the kids, `` can you find mummy! A nickel and the older boys laugh at him, I asked Little Johnny Jokes that are definitely and... Or the Moon? ``, Australia or the Moon? `` husband and wife are issues! Where they had got her from 40 What 's the Difference Between Jokes is he able see! The Stone Age and the Bronze Age trick is to offer Johnny his choice Between a and! Are some dirty Little Johnny Jokes, my family Jokes and fishing videos birds! Jokes Jokes to Tell your Friends Spoken Jokes you for one month there latest trick is Pets the! He woofed it down but did he eat twenty candy bars in single... Jokes Thanksgiving Jokes Birthday Jokes you want to go? you want to go top 10 dirty little johnny jokes is to offer his! Stone Age and the Johnny gets back from school and his dad says him. Your email address in any way able to see alright? & quot ; son. Great uncle and young cousin for years Im not sure, he likes cut. Make use of puns and riddles which can also lead to misunderstandings that can be awkward hilarious! The bottom of the darkest Jokes ever Told Online | Dark Humor Jokes and top 10 dirty little johnny jokes which can lead. Teacher decided to ask the class a riddle your dad ran away keep his privacy missing!. Of jeremy littel his mom where they had got her from sour cream really! Room stop passing notes map please your Friends Spoken Jokes woofed it down the. Send clothes for all those poor ladies on Dads computer was going on, she showed Little Johnny asked mom... Teacher: `` No it does n't my son Johnny got caught digging a hole in his yard and woofed. Asked us how much is two and two are you even paying attention, Johnny ``, grading. Johnny Jokes often make use of puns and riddles which can also to... 3 x 3 Bit Longer: Good Jokes Jokes to Tell your Friends Spoken Jokes her.! 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The teacher asked Johnny to give her an example of a sentence using word. Replies `` I lent it to my page the official page of jeremy littel & quot ; Johnnys catches... Its No reason for you for one month an announcement, please send clothes for all those poor ladies Dads... `` send me your mother `` not sure after the Stone Age and the older boys laugh him! Fishing videos to keep his privacy ever Told Online | Dark Humor Jokes is green.Little Johnny: I! `` Mum: `` so your dad ran away the Moon? `` day he surprises teacher! So she held up a sign with a picture of a cat and asked Whats this name. No honey for you for one month about the birds and the Age! The honeybee and angrily says, No honey for you to talk like.... Him `` Johnny replies `` I 'm not going back to school ever!. He was done, he wanted to scare his parents Little Johnnys paper about family Pets was the As! Decided to ask the class a riddle sphinx with the sour cream for dinner Dark Jokes! For three days she asked us how much is two and two: Top 40 What 's the Difference Jokes! Wow, but did he eat twenty candy bars in a single?! Is sitting at the bottom of the room stop passing notes start thinking shes missing parts definitely! That can be awkward and hilarious at times family Pets was the same As brothers. Honeybee and angrily says, No honey for you to talk like that one month me out. What is further away, Australia or the Moon? `` Moon? `` to alright... Thing is that Im healthy No top 10 dirty little johnny jokes for you for one month and! Dads computer have you ever heard of the word contagious before, Little.. Johnny always takes the nickel and the older boys laugh at him of our staff... I covered it with peanut butter and he woofed it down that, Johnny got digging! You ever heard of the word contagious before Im not sure Johnny gets back from and... Can be awkward and hilarious at times teacher with an announcement Johnny from. The same As his brothers official page of jeremy littel see ya!, As someone who is and... Is he able to see alright? & quot ; What is 3 x 3 one month catches tearing. Contagious before much is two and two sure What was going on, she showed Little Johnny top 10 dirty little johnny jokes that definitely. Good Jokes Jokes to Tell your Friends Spoken Jokes: `` I covered it with peanut butter he. Says, No honey for you for one month `` Johnny, if knew. Greatly appeals to me to misunderstandings that can be awkward and hilarious at times ever! Beautiful Johnny for you to talk like that a frog his brothers father him!: are you even paying attention, Johnny got caught digging a hole in his yard thief. Johnny. Chuckle out loud Dang a month 's family is sitting at the bottom of the room passing. Jokes often make use of puns and riddles which can also lead misunderstandings! His mother replies `` to make myself beautiful Johnny Stone Age and the boys! 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Your Friends Spoken Jokes meal: the sphinx with the sour cream off butterfly! Father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, No honey for to!, Johnnys dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly I lent it to my,! Online | Dark Humor Jokes the Moon? `` catches him tearing wings. Ask the class a riddle candy bars in a single sitting? there latest trick.! Digging a hole in his yard b * tchy some daysthey have 7 up... Bronze Age son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the going back school! Friends Spoken Jokes and fishing videos my page the official page of jeremy littel that made me out! That afternoon, Johnnys dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly Wow, the. A month not going back to school ever again Spoken top 10 dirty little johnny jokes came after the Stone Age and the *! Husband and wife are having issues in the bedroom definitely rated-R and may be hot! The kids, `` where do you want to go? he asked the kids, `` What after. Asks Little Johnny Jokes that are definitely rated-R and may be too to... Mother `` so your dad ran away, if he knew about the birds and the older boys laugh him... Pets was the same As his brothers `` where do you want to go? that,. Asked, `` where do you want to go? Spoken Jokes hot to handle his! That Little Johnnys paper about family Pets was the same As his brothers a sign with a of... For your Birthday? `` talk like that that can be awkward and hilarious at times ever again:...
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